Ebb and Flow

The slow methodical rhythm of waves coming in, rolling into the sand and washing back out. Ebb and flow. A relaxing soothing sound, pleasing to all senses and invigorating. The mesmerizing effect of waves coming in, the calming colors as the surf breaks on the beach. The captivating affects of the water as it undulate in and out.

I am feeling calm [today] like the steady flow of water, coming in and going out. Coming in, and going out… A steady pace and movement that is a measure of time in the most subtle of ways. One could spend hours watching the waves, and yet it can feel as if no time has passed. It is with the ebb and flow of waves cascading to shore time almost stands still because the visual change is all but nonexistent in a small frame of time.

It is too cold to sit on the beach looking at and hearing waves crash on shore. The tranquility flowing water creates, and the sounds I hear, and what those sights and sounds evoked in me. If I close my eyes I can almost recreate the same feelings: hope, purpose, calm, acceptance, as if time stands still because of peace.

Peace and calm, the unbridled feeling of serenity. A change of course, but so subtle it is accepted as if no change has come, because it can’t be felt. Day by day life at times can be so calm no change is detected, except by looking back. It is at these times we feel the most comfortable and it is why routine is so important, because we come to depend on it.

The movement of time is change. But it is only when we feel optimistic or hopeful about the experiences that it doesn’t feel like change. Water ebbing and flowing, waves hitting shore is a constant change but it is accepted because we depend on its ability to bring hope, peace and comfort. We all look for comfort, as it evokes happiness and feelings of being content.

Today I am content. I am relaxed and feeling at peace in many ways with myself. It has been long overdue to have any feelings of acceptance over my life and real feelings of hope. Change is always with us, but this time change doesn’t feel as subtle as I would like, but it certainly feels much more subtle than the changes I have been having for some time.

I’m letting go, focusing on me, and my two girls. We are a family. I am feeling the ebb and flow of time slowing to a rhythmically chaotic free period of positive change. It is welcomed and accepted as I, we all move forward. I’m feeling hopeful.

But really right now I am more tired than anything, so I’m off to bed😴

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