The job I have been blessed to get hired for and work at the last two years, I cannot say enough about. Especially considering it is the people I have had the great fortune to work with that are what make it so awesome.
I have since day one been made to feel extremely competent and valued. Never have I had such a wonderful work experience. Never! I bring this poignant fact up, because through the course of my life I’ve dealt with feelings of inadequacy because of who was in my life, and the profession I worked in.
When you are frequently devalued and talked to in disparaging ways, frankly you don’t know how you are truly seen and you doubt who you are and your skills. Over the course of the two years I’ve worked where I do, I’ve received the most generous compliments, positive comments and accolades about who I am. I cannot tell you how rewarding and amazing it feels to hear ” Wow, you make work a happy place.” “Because of you they kids are where they are.” Or you’re a great person.
I have always put my all in what ever I do and will not do something that won’t bring me true happiness. I have always tried to put my happiness first, as it’s one of the most important things to a good life. Truth be told it’s the only thing I have control over.
For the first time in my life, I’ve felt totally appreciated, needed and liked beyond any hopes or dreams I could have ever come up with. I totally believe the positive comments spoken of me for the first time in my life, unequivocally.
I can remember being semi forthright and brassy at a young age, albeit incredibly uncomfortable in my skin. I had it imprinted upon me I was unlikeable, ugly, stupid and unwanted, what’s worse is I believed it. However for self preservation I became somewhat aggressive and stood up when I deemed it necessary to protect myself or anyone else who needed it.
I am the type of person who will take over, not to be in control necessarily but to ensure things are completed right. I will not intentionally step on toes, but if need be I will – I like to see things done efficiently and not leave loose ends. I also want to ensure what needs to be done, is done and right.
I realized I can and have come across as brazen and brassy, but I will NOT be take advantage of if I can help it. So at 11 years old while my mother and her 20 something boyfriend were passed out drunk, I decide to take the tapper off the barrel, to prevent the derelicts from steeling beer from the keg.
To this day I remember many instances like this where I stood my ground, trying to gain some control over and some resemblance of normalcy as a child. Looking back I can’t say I needed the life lessons I got, but I can tell you as a result of what I have experienced I have learned (albeit the hard way) I am an amazing woman who you would be fortunate to get to know.
My past no longer defines me. The critical echos fall on deaf ears. I will not let someone else say who I am.
After all I’m one in a million. That’s a good thing. ☺️